I woke up and I feeling happy! Listing to music that's adding up to an even happier feeling. Everything will be ok. I now know what I want.
I met Ashley, an old co-worker, on the subway last night. Haven't seen her for 6 months and she was asking how I was doing. When I was talking to her I realized that even though stuff have been up and down things are good, I'm actually ok. When she asked how I felt about not working there anymore I said: "Oh there? This is the best that ever happened in my life. I'm so happy!"
Americans say that and don't mean it, but I mean it. The last 6 months have been the best months in my life. They ended like shit the past weeks but hey, life goes on. I feel ready to start now.
When I got home I wrote an e-mail that I have been dreading and realized that I didn't care anymore. Of course I'm sad but when stuff don't work you get sad, get it out and find new adventures. I'm so damn good.
Oh, have to tell about yesterdays weird experience. Met up with Kirsten and two of her friends. No idea where they were going but they went to an burlesque show. Don't even ask why anyone would want to go for that when it involves half-naked women (what happened to they guys?) Oh well, stupidity.
One of the people I hanged out with was Swedish, 19 years old. Apparently she had never finished high school, just went one semester in Sweden and after that she has been working. Wow, who doesn't finish high school? I so do not get that, made me feel like I was 65 or something, haha. But somehow I am happy that I'm the age I am, knowing more. When I was 19-25 I was messed up. It took me many years to feel content with everything, before that everything was just a circus.
Anyway, got out and walked Manhattan up in the rain. I was thinking and realized that I'm a nice person, too nice and I want things to work to any price. For me failure is just not on my plate but sometimes you just have to let it go and yesterday I did. Time heals, we all know that. Been there, done that. Life is to amazing to not be happy! With that said I'm starting my new job tomorrow and I'm going to make them love me from the first minute. Hey, I'm Linda and I'll survive in all weathers.
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Hmm nej, tyvärr, vet inte.
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